


A New Home

by Lia_Lia



Series: A New Home [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Post War, someone's pregnant!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-31 00:04:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 12,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17838563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lia_Lia/pseuds/Lia_Lia
Summary: This was the last part of the first part of A New Home. Part 2: Someone New is waiting for you !Thank you for your reading !Lia





	1. Chapter 1

It was the third of October 1998 and Harry sat alone in the deserted potion classroom. He didn’t even have to try to picture the scene that should been playing in front of his eyes, it was there: Snape wandering around them, his eyes unreadable as they watch them brew, Hermione biting her lips in focus while Ron would be mumbling to his cauldron. Zabini and Malfoy would be working without talking; only glancing at Parkinson’s potion from time to time to correct something he would later repeat to Ron. As always, the lesson would end up when Seamus blew something up. He had learned new ways of making things explode and never failed to help Neville escape Snape’s animosity.  
But not today.  
Today Harry was sitting alone at his desk, letting his fingers feel the old wooden table as he wonders what happened to them.  
Not many people he knew went back to Hogwarts. The Patil sisters were taking their classes from home, he heard, and Cho’s family had moved away. Hannah told him that Ernie had joined the Auror Training Program while Finch-Fletchley had temporarily left the Wizarding World for a year at Eton. None of the Slytherin he knew seemed to be there either. But hopefully, his best friends were still by his side. He still had Neville, Dean, Seamus, Ron and Hermione with him. His heart missed Ginny and Luna. They were supposed to be here too, but he hadn’t seen them since they took a Portkey to Brazil after Fred’s funeral.

“You ok Harry?  
-Oh, I hadn’t heard you come in.  
-I’m sorry, I didn’t want to bother you.  
-No no, it’s fine Nev, you can stay. I was just, you know, thinking. It’s been kinda weird lately.  
-Hogwarts will never be the same, not for us.  
-I’d hope you’re wrong.” Harry shrugged. “but it feels true. Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home. It doesn’t feel like home anymore. When, when I came back here, the very first time I saw the castle from the platform, it felt like home. But home isn’t a place, right Neville, it’s its people. And our people, I don’t know where they are anymore, but it isn’t there.  
-Harry, I have something to tell you…  
-You’re leaving, too, that’s it? I know you’re taking some NEWT next week. I saw your book.  
-I’m… I’m going to have a baby.”


	2. Chapter 2

30th April, 98.  
I broke up with him today. I couldn’t tell him about the baby. About our baby. He’s already suffering too much, between Ombrage, Snape and the Carrows. His friends and him are still resisting, still fighting. If I tell him about the baby… I’m afraid he would try to protect me and risk his own life in the process. He has become so brave lately. I never thought I could fall for him. But here am I. Seventeen and pregnant with his child. Sweet Merlin. What have I done?  
I know it’s too late to do something about it. If I go back to Mrs Pomfrey and tell her I changed my mind... for a week or two, maybe she’ll send to St Mungo and… and I wouldn’t be pregnant anymore.  
Is it wrong that I don’t want to? That I want this baby to live even if I don’t know in which world they will grow in? If Voldemort wins the war… I’m a pure blood, and he’s, too. Maybe we can survive his reign of terror. But he would never stop fighting, will he? Even if we run away… He would try to fight for a better world; he would say things like “our child deserves the world I’m fighting for”. And he would be right. But then, he would die, and my baby would never know his father.   
If only I could tell someone… but mom and dad would kill me/ and him. And my friends would never understand… I’m not even sure that we’re friends anymore anyway. We’re barely talking anymore. Everything in this castle is slowly rotting and smelling like death. We haven’t heard about Harry for months. I guess he ran away with Hermione and Ronald, making babies in France. 

But what if Voldemort loses? If he loses, I would have deprived my child of a wonderful father. If said father wants him. I can’t picture him rejecting us, but… he’s not used to them as I am now. If I tell him for the baby and he rejects me…  
Stop, enough thoughts for today. Time to go to sleep.

I really like Alice, if it’s a girl. Just like his mom.  
I’m gonna make it out alive for you.   
And I’ll tell dad. You just have to be patient.


	3. Chapter 3

Harry stood up, silent, as Neville’s words reached his brain. He was going to have a baby. A baby. Neville was going to have a baby and he didn’t have a single clue on who was the mother. Neville was going to have a baby. Neville had had sex with someone. Neville who, not so long ago was waltzing on its own after the Yule ball was going to have a baby. Neville who never dated anyone expect Ginny at the Yule ball was going to have a baby.  
“How?” was somehow the only word his brain could manage.  
“I’ve met this girl while you were um, hunting, and I don’t know how but we end up dating and now she’s pregnant. It wasn’t planned, but she’s almost here, so I have no other choice but to leave school. I talked to Professor McGonnagal before summer and that’s why I’m only studying herbology ten hours a day, six days out of seven. Once I have my NEWT I have a job at a flower shop. It won’t be easy, but my granny isn’t pleased with the new and hasn’t planned on helping me financially. She said she’ll help me with the practical things such as how to change a diaper and how to hold a baby but I need money to feed the baby and buy said diaper and so I need a job and  
-Neville Neville stop please! You’re going to die if you don’t breath!  
-It’s a little bit overwhelming.  
-A little bit, yeah. Just breath for a few secs, okay?  
-I don’t have a few secs! She’s due for early November!  
-She?  
-Yes, she.” Neville smiled, nodding. “A little girl. A watermelon sized baby girl. But that’s all I know! I just know she’s watermelon sized! And that she’ll be Scorpio. Why would I care about her muggle astrologic zodiac? I’m going to have a baby in a month Harry! A baby! I don’t know anything about baby! Or about anything in general. I’m just a kid, I’m not supposed to have a kid on my own, not now. I’m not even able to keep an eye on a toad! So a baby! I’m gonna make her fall or forget her in the bath or the train or  
-I’ll help you! Neville, I’ll help you! I promise. You won’t be alone. You won’t be alone and it’s gonna be okay. Do you hear me, Neville Longbottom? You won’t be alone. Now breath. You’re gonna be a great dad, ok? Say it, you’re gonna be a great dad.  
-I’m gonna be a great dad.  
-Again.  
-I’m gonna be a great dad.   
-Does anyone except your grandmother and Professor McGonnagal know about him?  
-Her parents and bestfriends.  
-Are they supportive?  
-They kicked her out of their home. She’s staying at her best friend’s place until we gather enough money to rent a flat.   
-Shit I’m sorry… Do you… Are you guys together?  
-Yes, since last year. But no one knew… Harry, you have to promise me you won’t be mad…  
-Why would I? You haven’t get Ginny pregnant, right? Neville, you haven’t get Ginny pregnant?  
-No no no! Plus you were together back then! I wouldn’t have!  
-Geez. Then, who’s the girl?  
-Promise you won’t be mad.  
-You’re scaring me. But okay, I promise.  
-I’m with Pansy Parkinson.


	4. Chapter 4

Pansy was lying on the bed, facing the world outside of the window. It has been days, and she hadn’t said a word.  
“Pansy… Talk to me, please…”

The silence treatment wasn’t new. She had always made up walls to protect herself, and those walls had always needed silent. Ordinarily, he would have given her some space and time to deal with whatever she had to deal with; waiting patiently until she felt ready to open up. But now wasn’t ordinarily, they didn’t have time. The Aurors would show up sooner than later.  
“Pansy…” he whispers again, afraid to speak out loud; afraid of his own voice in the silence of the Manor. “I’m here.” He climbed on the bed and snuggled against her, hiding his face in her long dark hair, twisting their hands. “I love you Pans. No matter what’s going on on your head, and no matter what’s going to happen, I love you.” “I love you” he repeated, when he felt her closing the gap between their bodies. “and I will always love you.  
-I love you too, Draco.” She finally whispered back, raising their linked hands to her lips. She was crying.

The moon was high when a thud noise woke them up. Eyes opened in the dark and hearts beating fast, they heard Narcissa high pitched scream.  
“The Aurors.” Draco finally realised, quickly rising from the bed and running to the door, trying to lock them in. It hasn’t been another nightmare; the sounds were real, they were real. And Pansy wasn’t moving. “Pansy, you have to Apparate to Blaise’s. Follow the plan, Pans’, move! You have to go! Now! Apparate!  
-Come with me!  
-I can’t! Come on Pansy, go! Please, I beg you! They can’t find you there! You haven’t done anything for Him, they can’t find you here! Move, please!  
-Draco…” Her body stayed still as she turned her head toward the window, catched by the numerous Lumos coming from the gardens.   
“Draco! Draco son! Come downstairs now!” they heard Lucius call. He was giving them time, it was nearly too late.  
“Pansy! Go away!  
-I’m pregnant Dray.” She croaked, finally turning her gaze to him.  
“What?  
-I’m pregnant!  
-You’re pregnant!  
-Draco! Downstairs now! They won’t hurt you!” his father’s voice was nearer, and he swears he could hear people run up the stairs.  
-Oh Sweet Salazar Pansy! Should I congratulate you?  
-Could you?  
-Is the father good to you? Does he love you?” he hurried, hope blowing in his chest.  
“He told me so, but I broke up with him, it’s Neville, I was so scared and now I fucked up everything and  
-Draco! Out! Now!  
-Draco!” His mother’s voice echoed.  
“Get back to him. Apparate to Blaise and get back to him. They will take care of you. I love you Pans, now go! Please, for the child, leave now!  
-I love you too, Draco!” she cried in a loud crack as the door behind Draco’s back began to tremble.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry stood silence, shocked, for the second time in less than fifteen minutes. The mother was Pansy Parkinson. Pansy fucking Parkinson.  
The girl who tried to held him to the Voldemort.  
It just couldn’t be true.

“Harry, please, say something.   
-Pansy Parkinson?  
-She’s really nice, when you get to know her.  
-When did you get to know her? How the fuck did you get to know her?! Last time I saw her she tried to get me killed! And now you’re telling me she’s pregnant? That you got her pregnant? If this is some kind of a joke, it’s a really lame one.  
-I’m not joking, Harry. I’m dating her since last December.  
-Last December.  
-We had detention together at Flich’s. She had hex a Carrow, to avenge a girl he had hit.   
-And a good action is enough to buy back a past of pettiness and cruelty?  
-She’s not cruel.  
-So we agree on petty.  
-Harry…   
-She tried to get me killed; I have the right to call her petty.   
-She didn’t want to, she  
-She wanted me to die. She wanted me to surrender when an army was standing outside of our walls, Nev’. She was the reason why all Slytherins ended up in the dungeon instead of in the battlefield, fighting with us. She betrayed us.  
-She was trying to save her baby. My baby.  
-By having all of us killed?  
-It was a really stupid plan.  
-Indeed.  
-She’s sorry. She’s really sorry. She threatened you to make sure our child will live whatever side win! If we had lost that day, I’d be dead and she’ll be raising our child in a convent. If we had lost and she had run to my side, Voldemort would have killed her too.  
-She’s a Slytherin, a Pureblood, Malfoy’s bestfriend, if we had lost and she’d stayed silent, she’d have been safe. There was no need to send me to Voldemort.  
-She could’ve hexed you. She’s brilliant, you know? She could’ve hexed you and carry you out herself, but she didn’t even try.  
-Bless her.  
-Harry. I’m trying to tell you that she isn’t the mean girl you think she is! And even if she’s been, she’s not anymore. And she wasn’t anymore when I talk to her for the first time last year. Believe me Harry. Believe in my judgment. Have I ever been something else than a friend to you? Have I ever been unworthy of our trust?  
-Neville…  
-Just try, Harry. Promise me you’ll try.”  
Harry paused for a few seconds, inhaling deeply before nodding toward his friend. “If I found out she’s still that sneaky little bitch, I’ll rip her heart out.  
-Harry, she’s my baby’s mom.  
-I swear to Godric, don’t say that again or I’ll puke on your shoes.  
-Duly noted.  
-And, Neville.” Harry called out as his friend walked out the door. “I still love you.”


	6. Chapter 6

T,

I don’t know if my owl will reach you before they do. They broke into MM last night. I checked the news at dawn, they’re taking them to A. G has been taken too. I haven’t read about you, I hope you’re safe. 

P is safe. Terrified, but safe.  
We’ll meet where it had all begun when the week is over.  
B.


	7. Chapter 7

“Come on, Ron, you promised me you’ll help me!  
-But I promised Harry we’ll play tonight, sorry!” Ron lied as they got into the common room.  
“Is it true, Harry?  
-Huh?  
-You arranged a game tonight?  
-huh, yeah, sure. Wanna join?  
-I got my DADA essay and  
-Have you ever played Quidditch Hermione? I’ve never seen you.  
-I’d rather watch than play.  
-You never tried?” Ron, apparently stunned by the new, stopped dead on his track. “How come?  
-Neville never had, either.” She tried when she spotted the boy reading by the fireplace.  
“Neville what?  
-You never played Quidditch, right?  
-I almost die the first time I got on a broom for the recall.   
-Long time ago, come on, we’re playing tonight!   
-I still don’t want to die.  
-Nev be fun for once! You’re acting more hermionish that Hermione herself!  
-Hermionish?  
-He’s practically dating his books.  
-At least they’re not trying to break his neck.  
-Lovebirds, lovebirds, please be quiet.” Seamus asked, climbing on the couch. “We’re not going to study tonight, but we’re not gonna play Quidditch either. Tonight we celebrate!   
-Dean, get your leprechaun under control, for once.” Harry teased as said leprechaun stand still on the couch, arms open to the ceiling.  
“Wait for the final.  
-oh my, what’s going to explode?”  
Dean raised his eyebrows, trying to contain a smile as Colin came running into the Eight Year common room, glass bottles in his hands, screaming I got them!I got them! to Seamus.  
“I fear for my life.” He whispered as Seamus began to shake vigorously one of them.  
“And I fear for mine.” he smiled, not taking his eyes away from his lover. “I fear for mine.  
-You all know by now how amazing Dean is, right?” People cheered as Dean hide his face in his hands, making Ron and Cormac whistled louder.  
“He’s not going to propose, right?  
-He better not.”  
“Well, Minnie knows it too! She asked him to do a mural on the courtyard; he’s gonna paint for Hogwarts! He’s gonna paint History!  
-Mate! Congratulations!  
-Come here, love, they wanna hear it from you!”

 

“Wow. That was pretty intense for a Thursday night.” Harry enthused, back in their shared dormitory. The party was slowly fading now that they had retired upstairs, but they didn’t really care. The new has been shared and the sparkling wine drank. Life still had happiness to offer them, they knew it; they were still teens, they remembered it. But their need to celebrate every little glimpse of happiness came from a dark place within their heart, and they knew now not to live harder than they felt.   
“Congrats mate. That’s fucking brilliant.  
-Seamus makes it seems far greater than it is, you know.  
-McGonnagal asked you to paint the Second Wizarding War and honour the fallen, Dean. That isn’t anything. Your work is going to be there for decades! Harry’s right, it’s fucking brilliant!  
-It’s just…” Dean sighed, suddenly looking away, searching something in the darkness of the night.  
“It’s okay. We’re okay now.” Seamus reminded him, leaving Neville’s Wizards and Witches cards to get to his side. “It’s over now.” He said, trying to keep his voice low and steady as he kissed his boyfriend’s temple. “We’re okay.” He repeated a last time, snuggling himself against him.  
“It’s just…”he began again, gripping Seamus a little bit closer. “It reminds me of Luna. When we were in the Malfoy’s cellar, we used to paint on the walls. Malfoy had found out and started bringing us pigmented coal. That’s all we did for weeks. Paint with our fingers on dirty walls.  
-But there wasn’t light.” Ron objected, slightly shivering at the memory of Hermione’s screams. “We couldn’t see much down there.   
-I never said it was pretty. But it did keep us sane. And hopeful. And, and that what I want this mural to be, you know. I don’t want to paint what happened. I don’t want to paint the snatchers chasing us, Fudge lying to us or even the Goblet of Fire. I don’t want to paint Wood and his guys flying over Hogwarts at the start of the battle, I don’t want to paint the statues jumping down of their pillar. I don’t want to paint you, Neville, taking out Godric’s sword. I don’t want the pain, anger and madness we all felt to flourish on Hogwarts’s walls. I only want to draw the hope. But how can I do it now? Half of our friends hadn’t come back. Luna and Ginny … Sometimes, I don’t even know where to look to find hope. I know I’ll be happy. I’ve got you, I’ve got Seam, but… there’s something still missing, you know? I’d hoped for this day to come, all of us in our dorm, and now that it’s here, I just don’t know.” He paused, shaking his head. “I don’t know.  
-I- I know what I hope for.” Neville started tentatively as no one seemed to be ready to talk. “I- I… I have hope in a better world. I hope my kids would grow in a better world than the one we grew into. We still have a lot to do, that’s for sure. We still need to heal and rebuilt our lives. But we also have to stay aware of our own bias and fight the pain that’s making us blind; cause we’ll all have to find within us the strength to forgive those who try to redeem themselves, and it will takes time, but I believe in it.  
Dean, I don’t know how it could’ve felt in the cellar, but the hope you hold on to, I’ve felt it. I had the hope to see a day where we’d be all reunited; alive, safe and happy. I’ve endured the Carrows because I believed in victory, I believed in peace and in a better world. You haven’t lost hope. You accepted McGonnagal offer because you believe in a future where students would learn about the war we made without worrying about how frail peace could be. You don’t want to paint pain and suffering because you have this hope that their world would let them be carefree and happy. And that day will come. But for the next decades, kids will get to Hogwarts and learn about how they lose members of their families. And they’ll go to the courtyard and look up to your artwork and they’ll see what they died for, they’ll see why they kept fighting until the end. And that will pass from generation to generation: there’s some good in this world and it’s worth dying for. That what I hope for, a world which learn from his mistake and never try to forget. A world where this war could’ve never happened.   
-A world where a little Draco Malfoy would be shaking hand with a little Harry Potter.” Dean asked, trying to smile behind his tears.  
“In the world Neville’s talking about, my son could befriend his.” Harry nodded before slowly walking toward his friend. “I’m sorry for what I said.” He whispered before embracing the father to be.


	8. Chapter 8

If someone had ever asked Blaise Zabini what colour does he despite the most, he would have probably answered red; red as the Gryffindor beanie he was actually wearing to be precise. Turning the page of his newspaper, he couldn’t stop himself from laughing: wearing the Saviour’s colour has been the only logical choice he made when he planned to meet the son of a Death Eater in King Cross. The Aurors were patrolling everywhere, looking for allies of the Dark Wizard, and Muggle one has been given pictures of the fugitives. If he wasn’t amongst them and came back to the house alive, then he would consider himself lucky. Otherwise, stupid would be perfectly suiting.  
10h58. With a deep breath, Blaise stood up and, checking conscientiously his surroundings, stride toward platform 93/4. The entire plan was stupid. He didn’t even know if Theo had read his owl. Letters were still opened daily, and a coded one could have been considered dubious. And even if he got it, who said he’d be coming? They had never been great friends. The risk was too high. Anyone could be an Auror, or a muggle Auror. Who knew what does a muggle Auror looked like?   
10h59. He still had a few seconds. Breathing in and out, he pretended to lace his shoes, giving time for the weird looking guy to pass.   
At 11h, he had crossed the wall and stood alone on the platform.   
“Shit shit shit…” he mumbled, searching for a hint of a human being. Theo wasn’t there. No one was there. He’s been pathetic, thinking his plan has the smallest chance of succeed. When the week is over could have meant Sunday and not Monday and where it had all begun how fucking precise!   
At 11h02, he decided that he would leave the station at 05. Here he was the easiest target of the whole United Kingdom. There were cameras everywhere in the muggle part of the station; his beanie and an atrocious muggle jumper wouldn’t be a sufficient disguise if the authorities were really working hand in hand to capture every witches and wizards suspected of being linked to Voldemort. And he was sure to be on the list.   
11h03. He shouldn’t have stayed with Draco after he took the Mark. He shouldn’t have started to talk to Theo when Draco did. He should have been there for Draco before he took the Mark in the first place. Should have forced him to leave his home when his wonky father got out of Azkaban. Should have run away to France when Voldemort had return. Mistakes on mistakes, that’s what he’s done with his last two years.  
11h04. Something caught his eyes. A raven had landed on the platform, eyeing him. Did raven could eye people? Clenching his fist, he took a deep breath and decided that those last sixty seconds could get screwed. If this wasn’t a normal raven…   
“Croa.”   
Blaise heart achingly stopped in his chest as the raven start croaking again, as it jumped to face him. He couldn’t make a step without the damned bird croaking at him, coming nearer.  
“Croa.” The bird repeated, opening his wings, as others came flying above them.  
“Petrificus Totalus!” He shouted. The raven fell to the ground, petrified, soon followed by another, and a third one until all the birds were left lifeless. “What have I done?” he asked himself in horror as he finally lowered his wand. Around him, circling him, were dozen of raven, draining from their blood. The fall has been lethal. He stumbled and felt his entire body react to the ferric smell filling his nostrils. He couldn’t stay there. The scattered feathers, the blood dripping on the ground, it was a slaughter. Feeling his stomach constrict again, he started running until he crossed the wall. He had to get away from there as quickly as possible. He had to leave King Cross before anyone found out the mess he made. He had to be home when the entire Auror department would be deployed, looking for the dark wizard who just performed a sinister ritual. He needed a plan. He needed to breathe. He needed to puke. But a hand grabbed his arm and pulled him behind the pillar with force before he could even try to steady himself. Panic invaded him as he fell his own body hit the bricks, suddenly blind to the world surrounding him. It’s over he cannot helped fearing as a hand covered hastily his mouth.


	9. Chapter 9

“Having trouble sleeping?” Harry asked as he found his best friend playing wizarding chess at 2 am in the empty common room.  
“Can’t sleep. You? Nightmares again?  
-Again.   
-Wanna play?  
-I dunno, I  
-Just sit. I’ll play for you.”  
Harry grinned slightly before curling himself in the sofa, accio-ing a plaid. The warmth and roaring blaze of the fire was comforting, extracting him from the numbness of the woods. Being with Ron had always helped him feel better. The Weasley had always made him feel safe; at home.  
“You know, I’ve been thinking about what Dean told us tonight.  
-The mural?  
-Hope.  
-Oh.  
-Do you think that’s why Ginny hasn’t come back yet? Because she’d lost hope in her future here?  
-You think she has?  
-She said she’ll be back for school. Mom said she’s send a postcard on the 4th, to tell us not to worry. But how can I not? She’s my baby sis…”


	10. Chapter 10

It was almost midnight when Pansy finally gave up and cast a shy lumos, blowing out the candles. Their flickering light was freaking her out more than lighting anything anyway and she couldn’t stand the strange shadows crawling around the shack they were hidden in. Blaise hadn’t come back yet, and the knots in her stomach grew tighter and tighter with every cracked and squeaked from the wooden planks. Outside, the wind was slamming branches against the windows, or what was left of them and she could feel the air coming in. It wasn’t a night to be left alone.  
Plus it wasn’t on the plan. Blaise was supposed to meet Theo at 11, and then they were supposed to come to the hutch. Blaise was gone for more than fourteen hours now; it couldn’t be good. Something had happened.  
Something happened to Blaise.   
Something happened to Blaise; too.  
He has been taken by the Aurors, or maybe the Muggle ones. Did they still torture people in the non-wizarding world?  
Or maybe someone recognised him and hexed him; leaving him bleeding to death in an alley. By now he was probably in St Mungo, lying unnamed in the mortuary. 

She heard him cry before they left his house. She knew something happened before they went into the woods. He had read something in the Prophet and had burned the papers before she could see it. Draco was probably dying somewhere in Azkaban and now they were taking Blaise, too…  
And she would never know if they were still alive.   
And she would die in there, alone and terrified.   
She would let herself die in there if he didn’t come back. She would never be able to survive on her own. She would never be able to leave the shack and get through the woods.  
No, no, no, she would. She shook her head, trying to dispel the thoughts running freely inside of her mind, before her eyes. She couldn’t let herself lose hope now. She had to stay strong and keep moving. She couldn’t collapse. Maybe Blaise has been taken; maybe King Cross has been guarded. Maybe they were looking for Theo and they had taken them both. But with or without them, she had to stay strong for her baby. She had agreed to stay in there because she feared for the little thing, but she still was Pansy fucking Parkinson by Salazar! She’d find another plan, and she’d stay strong; it was in her DNA.   
If he hadn’t come back by the morning, she’ll stocktake their food and supplies and keep waiting as long as she could. Thereafter she’ll hide in a convent and finds out a way to rent an owl to reach for Neville. Then, and if he doesn’t throw her away, he’ll help her fight for them and get them out of Azkaban.   
Yes, that was a good plan; a good backup plan; because Blaise was coming back.  
He was coming back.


	11. Chapter 11

Harry woke up to the sound of Hermione’s chuckle. He had fallen asleep on the couch with Ron, again. That was becoming to feel like an old habit. Ron’s thoughts were too loud at night, preventing sleep to release him from their reality; and he hadn’t stop making nightmares since he went back from the dead. They ended up wandering in the Burrow at ungodly hours before finally sitting back down on the couch, figuring out they were no point in keeping pretending. Dusk didn’t felt like a blessing for them as it did for Hermione. But dawn did. Dawn was when he’d wake up to a snoring Ron and realise he had taken his glasses off before they fell to the floor and covered him so he won’t get cold. Dawn was when he would take his cover off, and put them on Ron, so he could get warm before waking up. Dawn was when he felt the happiest to still be alive.   
“What’s so funny?” he asked, his voice croaking, as he rest his chin on the back of the sofa, looking toward the form of his best friend walking down the stairs.  
“Seamus.” Dean answered, coming behind her. “He bet he could make something explode during breakfast and Hermione bet he couldn’t wait until then.  
-And I win! He blew up his toothpaste, Harry! His toothpaste!”

Entering their shared bathroom, Harry couldn’t help but wonder how did his friend ended up being a magical TNT detonator: there was dentifrice up to the ceiling.  
“You should’ve seen Seamus’s face.” Neville smiled awkwardly behind him. “Not only did he burst his own, but ours too! And he doesn’t even know how! I swear he’s gonna blow up the castle someday!  
-He kinda already has.   
-Yeah, right. Talking about, I- I wanted to thank you, for yesterday. For understanding.  
-Would you, would you like to tell me more about her? How you met and how she was? Cause it feels like I don’t know this girl you fell for, and. I mean, if she’s important for you, then she’s for me.”

“As I told you, we met in detention.” Neville began to recount as they walked toward the lake. “At first I didn’t wanted to talk to her but … Filch locked us up for six hours so … we began to talk.


	12. Chapter 12

“You ain’t catching me Longbottom!” she shouted, five stairs ahead. “You’re too slow!  
-You’re defying me?  
-Only stating the obvious!”   
Neville shook his head in disbelief: he really was chasing Pansy Parkinson down, racing to the boathouse. And he was enjoying it. His heart was beating fast and he couldn’t stop smiling. Somehow he’d felt for her. He couldn’t tell if he fell for her bravery as she stood for first years or if it was her eyes sparkling with mischiefs when she looked at him. Maybe it was the way she laughs, bright and loud, unashamed to still feel joy or the way she walked, chin up and deadly glares to those who insult her and her friends. Falling for her hadn’t meant being blind or forgetful of their shared past, it had meant caring enough for her to open up and reveal who she really was behind the mask.  
“Got you!” she smirked as she grabbed him by his robe, pulling him close.  
“Yeah, you got me.” He smiled back, leaning toward her. Her smell had the power to shut down his brain, just as much as her red lips.  
“You know, no one ever goes into the boathouse.   
-Yeah?  
-Yeah. So you can kiss me.  
-Do you want to?  
-Yes.” She answered, closing her eyes as she felt Neville’s lips on hers.

Falling for him has been easy, but admitting it hasn’t. Neville wasn’t supposed to be her type. She always had crushes on people like Draco, Hermione or even Ginny; strong people who knew what they wanted and were able to fight for it. She hadn’t planned Neville was one of them. He had grown into a man far different from the little boy she thought he was, and it was he delight to discover him, she had to admit. His bravery and obstinacy toward a better world has been a surprise for her who had never given him a second thought, but his kindness and candor weren’t, and she was glad to realise he hadn’t lost them on the way. 

“Maybe you could kiss me again?” she whispered as Neville broke their kiss. “If you wanted to…  
-I’d love to.” He grinned, taking her hand. “And maybe we could be more than friends…  
-Like best friends?” she asked, playfully.   
The glitters in her gaze were back, and Neville felt his heart melt in his chest. “Like lovers.” He corrected, wondering where his fearlessness came from.  
“I’d like it.” she said, her eyes in his. She wasn’t smiling anymore, but he couldn’t see it, as he was mesmerised by something in her iris. “If you promise not to fry my brain.  
-Only if you don’t break my heart.”


	13. Chapter 13

Christmas was coming. The twelves Christmas trees glowed in the halls as garlands glittered in every common room. The Castle was literally sparkling from inside out. But sitting in front of the hearth, a wreath in her laps, Pansy felt empty. The burst of joy usually inhabiting her wasn’t there; for the first time since kindergarden, she wasn’t going to spend Christmas Eve at Malfoy Manor.   
Sitting in the middle of her common room, she could only feel the emptiness inside her. Draco hadn’t come back in September and his absence seemed to fill the air, now more than before. He had stopped sending her letters since mid-October and she couldn’t help thinking it had something to do with the rumours she heard in the late whispered talks saying that the Dark Lord was living with them.   
“Pans, you comin? McGonnagal’s not gonna wait forever.” 

 

The December’s trip to Hogsmeade has always been her favourite; snow battles, Christmas shopping, Honey Dukes and Daphne’s atrocious seasonal jumpers were like inevitable glimpse of Heaven in her eyes. Saying that Pansy Parkinson loved winter would only be an understatement; she practically lived for it. But when her friends started throwing snowballs at each other she slowed down, creating space between them. When Theo and Blaise decided to make a halt in Tomes and Scrolls, she followed Daphne around, heartlessly.  
“Are you alright sweetie?” the blond finally asked as they passed a choir. “You’re surprisingly silent. And distant.  
-I’m just not in the mood. I’m sorry I didn’t mean to ruin your day out.  
-You’re not ruining anything; I’m just worried.  
-You don’t have to. I’ll meet you guys later at the Three Broomsticks if that’s okay? I’d like to stay alone a little bit.  
-You know you can talk to me, right?  
-Don’t worry, ‘kay? I’ll meet you there.  
-Pinkie promise?  
-Whatever you want.” She shook her head, offering her finger to her friend. “I can’t believe you still believe in this.  
-But I do. I’ll be in there, if you change your mind.” She added, pointing toward a Christmas charms shop across the street. 

In other circumstances, she would have gladly crossed the street with her friend. And she’d probably have deal with her best friend absence by buying him one of those Christmas tree decorations he loved so much. But in those circumstances, it was too must to ask. So she turned her heels and began to walk away from the village, toward the little hill overlooking the Shrieking Shack. And there she was, looking at the odd house from afar when a familiar voice called her name. She didn’t had to turn away to know Neville was coming closer, she could hear his footstep on the fresh snow.   
“Hey… Are you okay?” he queried as he stood beside her.

 

You know, at first I was impress by her attitude. We were all slowly losing our composure, finally understanding what was really happening at Hogwarts, between the absence of all muggleborn and half the half-blood, the punishments of the Carrows, Filch’s adoration for Ombrage old teaching methods and the curriculum itself. I thought my world was tumbling down. But there she was, proud and reckless, spelling and hexing, standing up to us, as if she was born for it. Yes, I was more than impress. I was heels over head before the first snow. And only then did she let me get to know her more… deeply. She opened up and showed me her cracks, and I couldn’t but love her more at how strong she was for standing up when her base was all flickering. For months she’s tortured herself for having Death Eaters children as friends. Only the Greengrass girl wasn’t one. And I know what you must be thinking Harry, birds of a feather flock together, but it was terrorising her. For nights she couldn’t sleep, overthinking about it. Maybe she was petty, and maybe she sometimes acted out of “cruelty”, I would stay stupidity, but she never believed in all that pureblood superiority bullshit. She’s been raised to believe in certain things and she was only presented to other children raised to believe in those same things, but she finally chose to question all of it, because it never fully made sense for her. For her it was as if someone had just ripped off her eyelids. She’s been taught not to see any of it, and suddenly, it was everywhere. She was torn apart between her love for her family and friends and what she was discovering about them, wondering if she could still love them, wondering if she should cut those ties or try to rip off their eyelids. She was constantly feeling like a failure, feeling fake. I’m not trying to make you pity her, I just want you to know she has always been far more than what she made herself appears to be. She needed people to believe she was… how should I say it? Complete? Solid? I don’t know. But she also had her cracks, and she kept them hidden for months. And I’m not saying … She needs time to trust people, and until she trusts them, she won’t let them see her. It’s not a mask, it’s an armour. She’s protecting herself. And she let me in. She opened up to me and let me question her raising and beliefs. And I didn’t find anything awful.


	14. Chapter 14

“Neville! Neville hurry up! It’s Seamus!”   
The Room of Requirement suddenly felt too small as Ginny took him by the arm, running toward the door. Around them, the DA fell quiet as students stopped in their practise, anticipating the worst as they took their leader’s distress in. Running up the stairs, Neville couldn’t form any coherent thoughts. He knew the path, but his brain didn’t want him to realise he was rushing to the hospital wing. Yet, that was where they were heading.   
“What happened?” he finally urged as they slow down, taking in the sight of the closed curtain bed.  
“The Carrows. Parkinson found him unconscious on the third floor; said it was the Carrows. I rather warn you, it’s not pretty.”   
Ginny hadn’t lie. Seamus was everything except pretty, barely recognisable. His face was tumefied and his eyes were swollen too, purple from the blood within them. His lip was cut and bruises were already forming by his left cheekbone, down to his chin. His right was hidden behind a bandage coming from the upper part of his head.  
“They haven’t. Tell me they haven’t done that.” He whispered, coming closer to the bed. Now wasn’t the time for letting his anger out. Luna was shaking in a chair across the bed, studying carefully the potions in the bedtable.  
“He has some broken ribs too. But Madam Pomfrey says he’s gonna be okay.” Ginny informed him, as she placed a hand above the covers, where Seamus hand probably was. “But he still hasn’t wake up.”   
“He’s gonna be okay. He’s strong. He’s gonna be okay.” He tried to convince himself as a distant moan escape his friend’s lips.  
“D-Dean..  
-Seamus? Seamus, you’re safe. You’re at the hospital wing. You’re safe, Seamus. We’re here. Ok?” Luna murmured, gently stroking his hair as he feebly wailed his lover name again and again.  
“I’m gonna kill them. I’m gonna kill them!” Neville swore, gritted teeth, as he stormed out of the room, quickly followed by the redhead girl. “I’m gonna kill them and make them pay for it.  
-And then, what? You kill them, and then, what? You run to Abelforth? The gardens are full of death eaters and dementors! You’d be dead before midnight! Or worse. Is that really what you want? We’re gonna have our revenge, I promise you.  
-And until then, we’re gonna sit down and wait? We’re gonna let the Carrows terrorize and torture our schoolmates? Our friends?  
-We’ll keep training. We’ll keep training, and when the time comes, we’ll be ready to finally fight back.   
-I can’t.  
-You have no choice, Nev. We’re in a state of war. War! You can’t just act on impulse! You have to focus on the bigger picture. We have to keep Hogwarts until Harry comes back.  
You can’t just give us up.  
-I’m not.  
-Then fucking act like it!” she roared before leaving him alone in the middle of the corridor.

 

“How’s Seamus?” Pansy finally asked, nestled against her boyfriend in their secret alcove. He had barely spoken since he came out of the Hospital Wing a few hours ago. His friend was barely breathing when she found him earlier that day; she could barely imagine what he must be feeling.  
“Madam Pomfrey says he’s gonna be okay… but you saw him, right? You know how bad it looks like.  
-I’m sorry. I wish I could have done something.  
-It’s killing me. I wish I could do something. I wish I could…  
-He’s gonna be okay, love.   
-You don’t understand.” He murmured to her temple, matter-of-factly. “No one’s gonna be okay. We’re supposed to keep Hogwarts until Harry comes back. Then, we’ll fight to death. Thus I don’t see how anyone could be okay.” He sighed, closing his eyes.  
“Look at me. Neville, I said look at me. People die every day out there. People die. But Seamus isn’t going to. It was a close call, but he will make it, and someday, he’s gonna be okay. He’s gonna be okay because you’re gonna keep going. I know you, you’re not going to sit, hide somewhere and wait for the Mighty Saviour to come back. You’re going to keep standing up against the Carrows, maybe more now than ever. You’re going to keep standing up for the weaker, for those who are afraid, those who lay in hospital beds. You aren’t doing nothing. You weren’t there when Seamus got attacked, but it doesn’t mean you can’t be there for someone else, honey. It isn’t a fair fight, but I know you still in, right? And as long as you keep going, I’d bet on you. Now tell me, Neville, who are you betting on?  
-I’m betting on you.  
-I’m being serious here, darling.” She tried to repress a smile as he took off an eyelash from her cheek, keeping his hand against her skin.  
“And I am, too. I want you to join the DA.   
-I can’t.  
-Everyone knows we’re fighting for the same side. I’m sure they’d take you in.  
-I really can’t. I can fight against the Carrow; but   
-Then would you train with me? Would you fight with me?  
-Hell I’ll do. I’ll fight with you, Neville Longbottom. Until the very end.”


	15. Chapter 15

“What are you waiting for? Someone grab him.” Pansy’s words resonated in the sudden silence of the Great Hall, making Ginny rush toward Harry, shielding him behind her. Soon, every member of the Orders and DA were standing in front of him or flanked by his side, wand out. Harry couldn’t be taken to Voldemort, and they wouldn’t let anyone do so; even if that meant hurting a fellow student.

“Students out of bed! Students in the corridors!” Filch yelled as he burst breathless into the hall.   
“They’re supposed to be out of bed, you blithering idiot!” Professor McGonnagal snapped, as the caretaker, realising his mistake, apologized flatly. “As it happens, Mr Filch, your arrival is most opportune. If you would, I would like you to lead Miss Parkinson and the rest of Slytherin House from the Hall.  
-Where exactly is it I’ll be leading them to, ma’am?  
-The dungeons will do.” she concluded, taking her attention back to Harry. “I presume you have a reason for returning, Potter. What is it you need?  
-Time, professor. As much as you can get me.  
-Do what you have to do. I’ll secure the castle. Potter …” She called again, slightly unsure on what was left to say. “It’s good to see you.  
-It’s good to see you too, professor.” He said back, already on his way out. “Hold on the fort Neville!”

Neville nodded. He knew what he had to do. They had made so many plans during the last three months that he didn’t have to consult Ginny before exposing them to the Order. He knew that she was agreeing with him and would have proposed the same tactic; but he also knew she was too distracted to take the lead right now. Harry was back. After months of wandering, his presence filled the castle.   
Furthermore, organizing their defence and getting ready to fight for his life seemed to mute Pansy’s voice still echoing inside his head.

“Pansy, come here.” Vince murmured, already sneaking out from the group led by Filch. “Draco will need us. They will need us.” His tone was barely a whisper as he couldn’t refrain his enthusiasm. He was metamorphosed, waiting for the Dark Wizard to take the school like a child waits for Christmas.  
“I’m staying in the dungeon. And you probably should too. If Filch found you wandering  
-He ain’t gonna see us! The Dark Lord is coming Pansy! The Dark Lord! No one will even see us! This is it, the time has come!  
-I’m staying there. Blaise! Blaise!” she called out loudly, hoping to get scolded by the old man in the process, the other boy being ten foot away.  
“What’s wrong with you Pans? Haven’t been noticed enough already?” he chided her, going upstream.   
“Tell him we have to stay in the dungeon with the others!” she pleaded quietly.  
“I’m not stayin’ in the dungeon! My place is in the battlefield! With my father and my own!  
-Oh come on, Crabbe. You’re more likely to kill You-Know-Who by inadvertence. We’ll watch for you down there.  
-I am not going to the dungeon! Aren’t you gonna fight for the Dark Lord?! Great Salazar, you aren’t going to, are you? You’re gonna stay hidden and wait for a side to lose. And when you’ll get out of your stash, you’ll try to get in the winner’s good graces. I pity you.” He spat, suddenly pouting like first year Draco.   
“You can take your pity up your arse, for what I care. Come on, Pans, let gets to the dungeon before someone notice we’re missing.” He gave up, shaking his head before taking his friend by the hand. “I’m not gonna die for those fuckers” he muttered, walking them away.  
“And Draco? What are you doing of Draco?” Vicent yelled. “If we lose, he’s gonna die tonight!”

“Draco’s not gonna die, he’s not gonna die.” Blaise promised to a curled up Pansy. The room felt too small. On every faces, she could read the same anxiety she felt inside her, gnawing her. Theodore was on the other side of the room, his forehead against the stone wall. His father was probably somewhere at the borders, waiting for You-Know-Who’s orders. Locking them up in the dungeon, she’d avoided him the painful idea to face his dad, and die by his hand.   
She knew Blaise was talking to her, she could feel his breath on her cheek, but she couldn’t hear him. If You-Know-Who lose tonight, Draco would… but even if he won, who knew what he’d have send him to beforehand. Blocking her breath, she tried to steady herself, focusing on everything else. She couldn’t do anything to save her friend, not at the cost of her baby life. A baby whose father was currently getting ready to fight upstairs. A baby whose father was soon going to mate his fate, too.   
As Neville’s body lay lifeless in her mind, she started crying, trying her best at repressing the screams coming from her gut. She was going to lose her mind.  
“Pansy! Pansy!” Blaise whispered hardly against her ear, trying to hold her as tight as could be as she kept biting her hand. “Pansy breathe!” 

 

They won. But where was the overwhelming joy he had imagined feeling? He was sitting alone in a bench, and couldn’t find any solace in his surroundings. The castle was destroyed. Families were destroyed. People had died tonight. Many people. Too many. As Luna came, taking the place beside him, he smiled at her. In another universe, her presence would have been enough to bring him out of the chaos. But not in this one. Here, he’d have need another girl. A girl who had just betrayed him.


	16. Chapter 16

It was almost two in the morning when the wooden door creaked loudly. Senses suddenly on alert, she grabbed her wand, pointing it toward the bedroom door.   
“Pans?” a familiar voice called her from the living room. Barely raised, she let herself fall back in the mattress as she called him back, almost wailing, as tears of relief started rolling down her cheeks. He was back. He was back and he was alive. “Blaise!” she called, again, urging him to her as he burst through the doorframe.  
“I’m here, I’m here. I’m right here.” He whispered, embracing her. “Theo’s here too.  
-I thought, I thought they had   
-Shht, it’s okay. It’s over, now. I’m sorry things didn’t go as planned.  
-Can I come in?” Theo asked from behind the curtain “Everyone’s decent?” 

The morning sun found them sleeping, mix of limbs half on the mattress, half on the floor. Blaise had taken feathers in the sheets while Theo hadn’t removed his blood stained shirt, but for one more hour, it would stay unsaid, inexistent.   
They had fallen asleep squeezed up against each other after wordlessly agreeing on doing the talking later. Theo had practically collapsed from exhaustion as his brain understood he was finally somewhere safe. The week has been hard. They could allow themselves a break. They could pretend everything was fine for the rest of the night.

Theo woke up last. For the first time in a week, he stayed a little bit longer under the cover, appreciating the sunrays and the quiet laughter of his friends on the other room. Hiding his face in his hand, he sighed happily. He was safe and sound, and above all, he wasn’t alone anymore. Obviously the shack was spartian. He had had a small glimpse of it as he got in but in the cruel light of reality, it was even worse. The bedroom wasn’t empty; the two mattresses lying on the floor were all it could contains. There wasn’t any drawer or shelf, only a traveling bag full of neatly fold clothes, ready to get picked up at any time. Opening the curtain separating the two rooms he realised the door was in fact missing. On the so called living room, Pansy and Blaise were sitting on buckets, eating their breakfast on a rickety table. Their food was stored against the wall where a chair was used as a shelf.   
“You woke up!” Pansy smiled at him, pushing a bucket toward him. “If the gentleman wants to take a seat…  
-We didn’t really know where to go.” Blaise shrugged as his friend tried the balance of his seat.  
“It’s fine, okay? I mean, as long as you have toilets.  
-That door.” she pointed the only other door. “But don’t expect a shower.  
-As if I remembered what a shower is.  
-When did you leave your house?  
-I didn’t really get back, after… after…” he forfeited with a wave of the hand. “I got your letter by chance. I hadn’t meant to get back home, but as they had just taken father... I packed my things, took some galleons… I’ve been wandering in muggle London since we left Hogwarts… A roof is everything I’ve been praying for, Blaise. I know you guys are already on thin ice, I know how hazardous it is for you to shelter me. I am thankful. I didn’t mean to be disrespectful.   
-I know, I’m sorry.   
-What about you Pansy? Since we left Hogwarts?  
-I’ve stayed at the Manor until the Aurors came in. Then I Apparated at Blaise’s. He took his bags and you know the rest of the story.  
-So you saw Draco? Where is he?  
-I don’t know.” She avowed, biting her lip. “I... they came at night, and Draco… he said he couldn’t come with me.   
-They’ve been taken to Azkaban.” Blaise voiced out for the first time. “Same night as your old man. Front page cover in every magazine.  
-You never told me!” Pansy moaned, tears already filling her eyes.  
“How could I’ve? You stayed fucking silent for three days Pans! You were barely functioning, I couldn’t tell you!  
-He’s my bestfriend! I needed to know!  
-You knew! The fucking Aurors bursted into his house in the middle of the fucking night by Salazar! you couldn’t have imagined they were taking him to the ball? The Death Eaters has always rot in Azkaban Pansy! Azkaban!  
-Shut up! Stop it!” she screamed, trying to cover his words as he rose from his bucket.  
“Oh, and flash new: Draco is a fucking Death Eater!” he yelled before slamming the door behind him.

“You okay?” Theo tried as he finally found Blaise in the middle of the wood.  
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have. It’s just… I lose my temper. We… we had never talked about Draco before.  
-Are you mad at her for leaving him behind?” he asked softly, still making him look away abruptly. “You feel like she ran without him…” he added, resting a tentative hand on his arm.  
“She should have forced him!” he suddenly shouted, moving away. “Narcissa would have made up a lie to cover his absence, it could have worked! But she Apparated without him! And she dares! He! He’s in Azkaban for Merlin sake! In Azkaban!  
-Blaise …” he whispered, making a step forward.  
“It’s over!” he broke down, falling to his knees. “He’s never going to get out of there. No one ever gets out of there.”


	17. Chapter 17

“I think I’d like to know her.” Harry acknowledged as Neville stopped declaiming his love for Pansy Parkinson. There was no use in pretending that he wasn’t heels over head for the Slytherin girl, neither was some in pestering against the girl he once knew; she apparently wasn’t anymore. “Would you mind introducing me to her, someday? I mean, if you’re both okay with it of course.   
-You really do?  
-I hear you talk about the girl of your life for half an hour, Nev.” He smiled, fondly. “What kind of horrible friend would I be if I didn’t want to. I really want to get to know her for who she is now.   
-Harry...” he sighted, obviously relief. “Thank you. It- It means so much for me.  
-You’re welcome, really.” He answered, scratching his neck, uneased by his friend sudden warmness. Seemingly taken by the same feeling, Neville suddenly started picking his books for his daily classes before heading toward the door.

“Harry?” he abruptly asked, stopping short in the middle of the corridor. “Do you think I could tell the others? I mean, do you think they would listen, too? I want them to know her; I want all of you to. And when the baby’s here… I want you guys to be part of her life. But if they don’t accept Pansy... I won’t know what to do …  
-Hermione’s logical, family comes first for Ron, Dean testified at Malfoy’s trial and Seamus’s a big ball of fluffiness lately. I think they’d be okay with it. And if they aren’t, I’ll hex them.  
-I’m being serious here.  
-And I am, too. We’re more than just roommates or friends; we’re a family. We’ll stand with you.”


	18. Chapter 18

Blaise came back to the shack when dusk started to slowly fade the outdoor world. Laying down on one of the mattress, Theo seemed fast asleep, Pansy absentmindedly playing with his hair.  
“Hi.” He greeted quietly, closing the door as carefully as possible as Pansy crossed the few meters between them, taking a bucket to sit on. “Still worn out?” he asked, nodding toward the form on the bed.  
“Seems like. Told me about his week, how he slept on streets when he could sleep at all. I gave him your clothes, by the way. I cleansed his.  
-Thanks.  
-It was nothing a tergeo couldn’t deal with, actually. It’s quite an efficient spell when it comes to blood.  
-Cool.” He guessed, scanning their food stock. “I’ll cook dinner. Would you wake him up in a bit?   
-Leaving Draco behind, it broke my heart, you know. But he- he’d never planned on running with me. Or running at all.  
-I wouldn’t have left without him. I’d stayed by his side until we both could be safe.” He countered calmly, weighting the pro and con of eating the spinach tonight.   
“Blaise, please. He decided to get back to the Manor. He spent days there, waiting for the Aurors burst-in. He tidied up his room and burned things down. He was perfectly aware of the outgoing.  
-You’re telling me he willingly waited for an Azkaban cell?  
-I- I don’t know. But I know he did wait for the Aurors. I’m sorry Blaise but he didn’t fight. His parents called him downstairs and when I left, he was walking toward the door. He gave himself in.  
-I can’t believe you.   
-But you’ll have to! You can deny it as much as you want it will still be the one and only truth. He never planned on running away. Never.  
-But it makes no sense!  
-Maybe but that’s what happened. I’m sorry, Blaise. I’d have liked it to be otherwise… but he chose to stay.   
-May I say something?” Theo interrupted, walking over them. “I saw him at the Manor, during winter break. Father had… meetings… there. It was already too much for him to bear, it was eating him from inside. He took the Mark, he … Who knows what he was ordered to do? Who knows what he did and witness? I don’t, but I can guess… He hated it, being a Death Eater, but that doesn’t undo the fact that he was one. And I think that’s why he gave himself in; he knew that what he did was wrong so he did what he thought was right. I think he tried to pay the price...”  
Letting Theo’s words sink in, they stood in silence for a while. His pitch made sense. It was terrific in a way, but it made sense.  
“If you guys are ready, I think it’s time to figure out how we can help him now.” Theo directed.   
A few accio later, they were sitting around the table, feathers ready to plan everything up.   
“Firstly, I think we need to know if we’re really looking for.  
-Really, mate? We spent the last day running away from Aurors trying to find you.  
-But as you aren’t Death Eater children, or Death Eater, or even Allies of the Dar- of Voldemort, we have to be sure about it. And if one or both of you are wanted, we can’t just guess for what crimes. We can’t plan anything up without a foreseen of which potential penalties you could incur if we get caught.   
-Don’t get me wrong, I get the idea; I just don’t think we’ll find a list in a muggle newspaper. We’ll have to go back to the Wizarding World, and I think it’s too risky.  
-Maybe, maybe we can ask Neville.” Pansy proposed, avoiding their astonished gaze. She clenched her fists under the table, trying to stop her hands from shaking this much.  
“Neville? Like in Neville Longbottom?” Blaise asked first.  
“Indeed.  
-And why would he help us? He hates us!” Theo asked second, hands moving in disbelief.  
“I dated him. Back in Hogwarts.” She blurted out, making them both curse in surprise. “He’s not the weak-minded we thought he was, you know. He’s clumsy, that’s undeniable, but he’s brave too and he’s got a fierceness you’d be jealous from.  
-Are we still talking about Neville Longbottom?” Blaise inquired, earning a death glare from the other side of the table and a kick from beside. “Just asking! So, you dated him.   
-That’s what I just told you, yes.  
-And since you broke his heart, he’s going to gently give us what we want. Seriously Pans’, I’m not planning for a death trap.  
-He’s not going to report us!  
-Can you guarantee it?” Theo requested, trying to stay focused on the task.  
“Of course I can! I’ll talk to him, and he’ll help us.”

 

“Pansy, you’re sleeping?” Blaise whispered in the middle of the night.  
“What’s wrong?  
-Neville, did you love him?  
-Does it matter?  
-If you did, yes. I mean, maybe, yes.  
-I still love him.   
Blaise?” she asked after a few second of silence.  
“Yes?  
-Is it a problem?  
-You love a moron; it’s your problem, not mine.  
-Dickhead.” She smiled, turning to her side, hoping to fall asleep despite the fast beating of her heart.

“Pansy?  
-Something to ask about Neville again?  
-When did you date him?  
-From November to last April.  
-How could I never notice?  
-We hide it to everyone. We weren’t sure to be understood, even less tolerated. I being Draco’s bestie and he, Harry’s.   
-Romeo and Juliet die in the end, you know.  
-Who?  
-Romeo and Juliet. It’s a muggle theatre piece.  
-What?  
-Nott and Malfoy.  
-Oh. We’re not gonna die. No one is gonna die.  
-I hope so.”

“Blaise?” she called, in turn. “Are you asleep?  
-Not anymore. What’s wrong?  
-You really don’t mind, about Neville and me?  
-I really don’t mind.   
-Cool.  
-And, Blaise?” she murmured, laying closer to him.   
“I really want to sleep Pans.  
-I’ve got something to tell you.  
-‘M all ears.  
-I’m pregnant.  
-You’re what?” he asked urgently, suddenly sitting.  
“I’m pregnant.” She repeated kindly, sitting up too.   
“You’re… you’re pregnant.” He echoed quietly as Pansy slowly put his hand on her belly.  
“I am. Neville doesn’t know yet, but even if he doesn’t want the child, I do.  
-We’re gonna raise a baby in our shack then.  
-Blaise?  
-A death eater for godfather. Nott as home teacher; I’ll be the cool uncle. It can work out.” He kept mumbling under his friend amused glaze.   
“You’re the pervert uncle. I’ll be the cool one.” Theo corrected, his voice smothered in sleep.


	19. Chapter 19

Like every Friday night since the start of the school year, Harry was sitting in his dorm with his closest friends, sharing jokes and butterbeers. Ron was the exception, though. Lying on his belly, he was trying to finish his DADA essay due for the day before as Dean doodled encouragement on his drafts. The sooner he would be done, the sooner they’d be able to sneak out of the castle to the Quidditch pitch for a midnight game. The official Gryffindor team has asked him to keep playing as their seeker, but he had politely declined the offer after their first game. He couldn’t fly in the red colours; not anymore; not without his friends flying by his side. The win wasn’t worth the emptiness he felt above the grounds. Still, Harry came to their trainings, cheering and mocking whenever needed. But he missed the adrenaline, diving to the ground and the mesmerizing fly of the Snitch. Until the day Ron suggest a quick match after one of his trainings. Flying around chasing each other, they soon found out it was far more entertaining to wait for the sun to go down. Tonight they’d planned a 3 vs 3, chaser, keeper, seeker; Neville unexpectedly agreeing on playing Chaser, and if Ron hurried up, the odds were on their favour. On the Marauder's Map, Filch and Mrs Norris had begun their tour in the dungeon.  
“Will you be done in thirty minutes?” he asked his friend, accustomed to their routine. In thirty minutes, they’d be climbing the Ravenclaw tower, leaving them free to walk out in the corridors.  
“How look did it took you to do your essay?  
-Hours.  
-So how could I be done in thirty minutes? Plus Dean’s drawings are messing up my answers.” He growled as an ink knight piss on his third paragraph, making the room burst from laugher. “Can’t you just snog Seamus for Merlin tits?  
-I don’t just snog Seamus.” He countered, holding his ribs. Hermione had add a friend beside the knight, and he was currently handing him some butterbeers, dropping half of their content on the parchments.  
“Come on! I’ll never be done with it!  
-Then hurry up! Who knows what they’ll do when they got drunk!” Harry guffawed, not so sure that the Quidditch game was still going to be the highlight of his day.   
“What? No! Come on, Dean, erase them!   
-Do you mean they don’t they deserve a little bit of fun?” he asked, hovering his feather above the parchment, all malice and pride.  
“How do you fuck a knight in shining armour?” Seamus suddenly wondered out loud, making Ron turn red at the thought of having drawings shagging on his essay.   
“You pervert! Come on Harry, let’s get to the Quidditch pitch.” Ron forfeited, standing up.  
“I think I wanna stay there. See how it goes.  
-Harry, no…  
-Stop playing the virgin, Weasley. We all know you aren’t anymore.” Seamus teased, throwing a pillow at him. “Or maybe it’s disturbing you because they’re two guys?  
-Who said the knight was a guy?” Hermione retorted, taking it suddenly more seriously.  
“It could be a fucking hippogriff for what I care! I just don’t want it on my essay! Draw porn elsewhere!   
-You could draw porn on me.  
-Seamus!” they yelled in harmony, watching hilarious their friend taking down his shirt in the unsexyest way ever.   
“I’m gonna miss you.” Neville stated, matter-of-factly.   
On the bed, Dean let his ink dripped on Seamus’s skin. “What are you on about, mate?” he asked for everyone.  
With a quick glance toward a nodding Harry, Neville answered in a breath. “I’m leaving Hogwarts on the 24th.”  
“Shut up, please.” Harry ordered politely, cutting his friends’s thousand questions mumbling. “Let him talk.  
-Thanks, Harry.”   
As the dorm felt silence, Neville started telling them the same story he told Harry a few days before.  
The story of a boy who fell in love with a girl he wasn’t supposed to like and how they were now going to have a baby girl, named Alyssa Longbottom.


	20. Chapter 20

Sitting in the silence of his old bedroom, Neville couldn’t stop rehashing the same thoughts over and over again.   
She’d promised him. He hadn’t break her heart, she had no right to fry his brain.  
She had no right to break his heart.  
But in the darkness of his old bedroom, it seems pretty clear that she didn’t care about it. She’s done both. She switched side. And still, he meant every word he said to her. 

Burying his face in his pillow, he let out a low growl before hitting the mattress with all his strength. He needed the anger. He craved for rage to storm him up. He couldn’t let his heart drove him crazy. He couldn’t; but yet.  
He thought he knew her. And then, in a snap of her fingers, everything had turned terribly wrong, leaving him replaying the last months in his head. He had to see what he hadn’t back then, he had to find out the moment she snapped. Cause it had to be somewhere. And he had to find it. Cause if he didn’t… Then the little voices in his head could only be right. It would mean it had all been a lie, a masquerade against the resistance inside the castle. But they had to be wrong. They had to; he couldn’t handle it if his best memories were all faked. The sparks in her eyes, the happiness in her laugh, the warmth of their embrace, could it all has been pretended? Had he only saw his own feeling in her iris? Has he been the only one falling? Could he been the only one shattered now?

He had survived the Carrow and Voldemort himself. He had postponed death; to this.

Neville took the pillow and threw it to the window.  
He knew it was called a heart break; yet every inch of his body ached.


	21. Chapter 21

“Nev, can we talk? In private.” Seamus added to the bunch of first years circling him. Neville wasn’t as halloed as the sacrosanct Boy Who Lived Twice, but sorting Godric Gryffindor’s sword in the middle of the battlefield was enough to be known and respect by all.  
“About last night?  
-Yes. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…” he started, vaguely moving his hands as they both perfectly knew what he meant. When Neville had told them about Pansy and Alyssa, he had simply rose to his feet and left the dorm without a word. Dean had tried to call him back in, in vain. “I shouldn’t have left. It’s just… I don’t understand. I simply don’t understand.” He repeated, slowly, weighting his every word. “Yes, she’s carrying your child, but then? She betrayed us, she betrayed you and then you are, ready to give up your future to her. She betrayed you when it matter the most, Nev. When it matter the most. I’m- I’m just afraid for you. It’s so easy to believe when you love someone; it’s so easy to be fooled. I don’t want you to make the biggest mistake of your life because she made you think it was the only right thing to do. She doesn’t deserve you, she doesn’t deserve your forgiveness, and she- she just doesn’t deserve your future.  
-Are we still talking about me?” he softly asked as Seamus eyes had slowly become red.  
“Of course we are! You’re my friend! We’ve been through hell lately, and I know how- how love sometimes- I… Last year, when Dean was gone, when… when the Carrow… I remember how desperate I was for his presence. I just don’t want you to- to commit the biggest mistake of your life because you feel broken inside, okay? It just, I want you to be safe, and happy, with the good girl. And I’m afraid Pansy’s not. She betrayed you once, who can tell she won’t do it again?   
-She didn’t betray me, Shay. She followed a stupid plan. She knew no one would grab Harry, she just wanted to be out of the battlefield. She wanted our baby to be somewhere safe.  
-Neville… Do you know what it looks like? A fucking rescue pirouette.  
-Too pretty to be true, I know. For two weeks I thought she had switch sides. Two weeks during which I’ve been asking myself what capital information I’ve been given her, which lives I took with my stupid trust in her. And then, she was suddenly at my doorstep, begging me to let her in. It was raining, she was freezing, I let her in and she told me everything I wanted. Scalded cat fears cold water, those cunning folk use any means to achieve their ends blabla. How could I believed her? But it made sense, you know. It made more sense than her sudden betrayal. I knew within me it was true. And then, when she submitted herself to the Aurors, she took Veritaserum. And she told them the exact same things she told me before. You don’t have to worry about it, about me. I understand, and it means a lot to me, but we’ll be okay. I know I can trust her, and she knows she can trust me, too. Okay, Seamus? I’m not being fooled around.  
-If you say so.  
-Harry’s gonna meet her, and even if he can be pretty oblivious, he always know when something wicked our way come. Okay?  
-Okay.  
-Okay.” It somehow felt like a promise as Neville took a step forward and hug his friend tight. They were all going to be okay, he knew it.

 

Standing before the chimney in the middle of the Headmistress office, Neville couldn’t help but turn around to look at his friends a last time. It wasn’t a farewell, only a goodbye, but they were red eyed.  
Dawn had found them all awake, lying on the floor of their common room as they made promises they hoped none of them would break. The father-to-be didn’t know it yet, but hidden in his luggage were five little presents. Five little reminders than wherever he was, he would still have a home wherever they’ll be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the last part of the first part of A New Home. Part 2: Someone New is waiting for you !  
> Thank you for your reading !  
> Lia


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